Wild thing

{this is the post where you need so sing the words in your head. Do it.}

Wild thing, you make my heart sing, you make everything, groovy.

Wild thing, I think I love you.

Etc.

Now, while this is true, you also think bath time is torture, you need constant attention and praise, and you are even more of an 'into everything' child than your siblings. I mean, today you found your way up onto the kitchen table and plopped yourself in the middle of a coloring session, and threw all the pencils to the floor. 

But, seriously, the stinking cutest, nose-scrunching, best giggling little girl a mama could ask for.

Despite the weeping and wailing and gnashing of (sharp, pointy) teeth when I take away the dishwasher soap for the twentieth time in as many minutes. 

My heart really does sing, most of the time with you around.

It's good to be a mother

Mother's Day is hard, and wonderful, always emotional, and thought provoking, with women every in different situations and stages of life, all you can do is just be grateful for all mothers, and all those who have mothered in some way, big or small, you or the ones you love.

We'll leave that part of it alone.

Let's just remember how awesome Claire was today. (And forget the screaming and crying 'I don't love you anymore!...... ) she finally, FINALLY conquered her biggest fear of getting up in sacrament meeting and sang her little heart out, "mother I love you!"

I almost cried. Almost. 

Let's hope she keeps it up :) 

Really, truly, best Mother's Day. 

(Joe took me out last night for dinner to an amazing Indian restaurant, sans kids, and it was incredible. Seriously, that was the first long, uninterrupted conversation we've had since Christmas, and it was much, much needed. Huge, huge thanks to some awesome babysitters!) 

Love my little (okay, here in California, people think our family is huge- ha. Not) family.

start over.

I think it's time to start blogging again.

I read through some of the blog for the last little bit, and I miss it.

I have gotten so discouraged- lotsa personal things going on, and just not really feeling it for a while. But then I started remembering so many funny things. And realized I haven't shared hardly anything about my sweet (and prissy princess-syndrome!) Evie cakes. So! Back at it. New blog will have to wait a minute.

But Oh this girl- walking and babbling away now, and I love her to pieces. But she is also a little terror at church.

I've made the comment to a few people- 12-18 months is just the hardest for me. Really and truly- so many fun things, but also the hardest things for me. 

Also, I have to say this, I am not a lover of cloudy, foggy weather every other day. As much as I'm loving the good weather, gorgeous scenery, and some really fun things, this weather is driving me bonkers. Not as much as snow on may 1st, (ahem, Utah! Stinks for you. But I had 7 years of that, thank you very much) but still. Gotta figure out how to get past it! 

And what to blog about. Gotta figure that out too. 

california update

I am still figuring out what the heck i am doing.

I have a new blog. but, its not ready yet. its not quite where i want it, i need to flesh some ideas out, and fill some stuff in. and maybe design it...... ha.

so, to keep everyone in the loop. 

we live super duper close to the beach.

today was the first time we let the kids go run in the sand. for 10 minutes. its just a little colder than we would like. and thats fine. its still winter. and the beaches are small, crowded, and incredibly windy 90% of the time. we knew that coming here. thats why the focus has been on clam chowder and fish and chips :)

our days have been filled with lots, and lots of outside playtime. its warm enough to be outside nearly every day, but almost always with a light jacket or sweatshirt.

we have some wonderful parks close by, a gym that has a child play area and a heated indoor pool, a children's museum down the street from the base (where Joe is in school), and so much more. we haven't made it to the Aquarium yet..... but its high on the priority list! 

we have pretty much decided, we wont eat at the same place twice. there are way, way too many good places to try! i did find my new favorite taco shop to substitute Diego's in Provo. 

updates on the kids:

evie cakes

cute as EVER. and still not walking yet. praise to that girl that she has held on this long. i like to think its because she just really likes hanging out with me (unlikely) and not because she sees her siblings getting into trouble (likely).

The little stinker is creeping up on turning one in a few weeks, and it makes me ill to think about, so we'll leave it there.

love her to death.

oh, and she hates solid food with a passion. working on it.

but, she did finally start saying MAMA on my birthday. best present ever.

(before we left utah- the traditional sink bath!)

claire bear:

sassier by the DAY. i tell you what, she is giving us a run for our money that one.

but she is also so sweet, and full of giggles all day long.

loves her siblings. loves her parents. wants to constantly be doing, is getting better at writing her name, and misses everyone in UTAH desperately (and those in north carolina!)

i think she misses the snow, too. she kinda liked that stuff. or something. 

this picture cracks me UP. she looks like she has been awake for days. nope. but she did pour herself some yogurt, and dumped on some sprinkles (instead of granola.)

missing her bestie Adi

 and THIS dude.

only likes mommy when dad is not around.

is POTTY TRAINED. no really, after trying 983475938475 times, it finally stuck! (mostly because i was tired of buying diapers for two kids. yuck. ) he loves it, and its been an adventure potty training a boy. for us, a complete, and hilarious, rollercoaster. currently, trying to help him understand he can't just go in the plants (i think we would be kicked out of the military if someone saw it. and we cant figure out how he learned to do that!!!!)

he is so sweet, but also, strong-willed. boy will he do his best to get what he wants. he has leaned that the sweet face he inherited from his daddy doesnt always get him what he wants, and it makes him a little sad. working on it. he is so funny, and the best snuggler. love this kid.

okay, so this was THE sweetest thing in the world. we were have a night of family blessings for everyone, and at some point Bubba decided that he wanted to give his bear a blessing. so sweet Caleb gave Bear a blessing with some help. cutest, sweetest, most tender moment watching him learn about the power of the Preisthood.

With gf Kaylyn before leavning. I might be obsessed with her.

okay, so now just a few since we've been here:

down off the warf in Monterey. SO beautiful here!

making sand angles, and not getting their hair in the sand

 my smoking hot husband

free spirits!

AND, the saddest picture.

 from just before taking off on that winter morning, saying peace out to the snow, holding back the alligator tears, and looking forward to being reunited with daddy. 

 (shellie: that flag pole will come out sometime. when i tried to pull it out before leaving, it was completely frozen in the ground, and we had to leave it behind. ha!)

hopefully i will get the new blog together soon. i want it to be juuuuuust right.

and seriously, we have an open invitation for visitors. we have a really comfy new couch. and some air mattresses. and im sure my kids would share their beds :)

Um.

Here's the thing.

I'm a little tired of this blog. Are you feeling the same way?

But, I'm not done blogging. 

So, maybe I'll put something else together and we'll have fun figuring this thing out.

I love blogs- getting glimpses into other people's lives, staying connected, learning things!

But we are still unpacking, finding places for things. How did we get so many things??? And where did all those toys come from? So patience, all 3 readers. We'll get it back. Soon! For now, enjoy my little Evie cakes. I really, really wish I could bottle her up right now. On the move, but NOT WALKING, hallelujah! She is so stinking cute, best giggles, always happy. Stop growing little miss!

Ode to Provo

A late night ode to 'Provo'lone.

We met on a beautiful summers day, not knowing what the next 6.5 years would hold. 

It became center stage for much of my life's major events.

But most importantly, it taught. Despite the frozen tundra, the bizarre culture, and my own stubbornness, I learned love. 

I learned love in forms I didn't know existed, found love for those I didn't think possible, strengthened love in places I didn't know needed it, and created love, for 3 little people I love beyond the moon and back, a million times over.

It is here in P-town I fulfilled my life's dreams up to that point. And now I see how much better life can continue to become, and so it taught me to keep on dreaming.

Oh Provo. Perhaps you know more secrets than you let on. How can one so disenchanted become so attached? You make it extremely difficult to get over you.

It is here that the tightly-intertwined Mormon world gets tangled up into bigger knots that seems to forever get messier. And those happy coincidences put me right where I am.

You sneaky little happy valley. I hope you continue to stay the same, and be the place for my children (because that is the dream every BYU couple has for their offspring!) that you were for me: the background for some completely life-altering experiences.

Thanks Provo! And sayonara! (Uh, shoot. I think that's Japanese? Somebody look up Chinese for good-bye) it's been real. Now, it's time for warmer weather, and new adventures. We'll see ya on the flip side.

Oh and that's my little man. He had a pretty rough day, I will bet anybody he will be up by 4 am, seeing as he crashed on me around 6:30. Yippee! 

Taking a hiatus

I'll be back. And soon.

It's like, the first time in five years we are packing up our life and skipping town for a new adventure.

And it's the first time we know we aren't moving back. Probably ever.

But really, I am excited. My mom is not, but like she said, I must be more adventurous than her. 

And that's the truth. I have always wanted to see the world, see what's beyond my little bubble.

The kids are so excited to be with daddy, explore beaches, and leave the bitter cold behind. 

Me, too.

Mixed emotions, of course. We've been here five years! All my babies were born here, they all came home to the same house. Joseph and I met and started our life together here. My entire family is now here. How could this not be bitter sweet? 

And there I go, the tears are building up, so I will leave it at that, and say:

Thank you Utah. You meant more to me than i would have guessed. Ever.

But peace out snow.  We'll visit again. Someday. 

A new year.

My resolution?
Quit being so dang lazy.
My hope is that by doing that, I can accomplish the usual resolutions.

Like, canceling Netflix, and picking up my scriptures. Like, quit going out to eat, and make food at home (i can actually cook decent food when i try!) Like, stop taking naps (and going to sleep at a decent hour) and play with kids. Like, stop putting movies in, and read books to the kids. Following?

Like, living a life with purpose and living in it, and not in the lives of so much terrible tv.

With so much change coming our way, I think it's time to make things count.

In other news, first time in forever, no boyfriend to celebrate with. Just a bottle of bubbly. Maybe we will Skype, if I can stay up. Which is unlikely.

man of the house

 the destroyer. yahoo #2. bubba-monster. thing 2. little tornado. stinker-winker. bubba-love. mr. bubba. mr happy. grumpy-pants. bottom-less pit.

always up in your face

 he can be so sweet. so caring. so loving. he can be so sensitive to those around him, and comfort anyone who is feeling sad.

and always food, bumps and scrapes all over his face

but then sometimes, he is the little tornado, ripping through the house. 

and sometimes he is a little rough with his sisters. 

the snow was not appealing i suppose

 he has really developed his boy-ness lately. he is known for making ANYTHING into a gun, and will get rough with anyone who lets him. also, he is strong willed. if you step in the path of hurricane bubba, you are in for a rough ride. and he is a daddy's boy/momma's boy. his order of who does what for him is dependent on who is around. daddy first, (if he is around) then mommy, then grandpa, then grammy. not that he doesnt like any of us, but diaper changing, dressing, seat belt buckling, shoe tying, etc, all need to be done by the correct person. or else. just trust me.

um..... rough day?

part of it is being 2 years old. a lot of it, well, it is because of his dear father, from whom he inherited every single insane boy gene. so don't mess. although, the clothes-less-ness might come from both his parents. 

sleeping with his golf club

 but sometimes he is sweet. he loves his bear. and he is the best snuggler when he is tired. and his cheeks, oh those sweet, chubby cheeks. and his giggle, and his laugh. oh turn my heart into a puddle.

carrying that golf club with him on christmas morning. 

the boy does not stop moving until he is off in dream land, likely dreaming up schemes, acting out battle scenes, riding horsies, etc. i so wish i could peek inside his dreams at night. the only time i get a hint at what that is like is when he falls asleep on the couch and i pick him up to move him to his bed, and he yells something out. and tonight, oh sweet boy, kept his eyes shut but kept wailing for mommy, and snuggled up in my arms. 

love that boy.

the waiting game

This stinks. 

I mean, Christmas was amazing. Could not ask for anything better.

But just like that, it's over, husband is gone, and now all I can do is wait.

I could move next week.

Or 3 months from now. 

I have no holidays, birthdays, events, or anything to put in front of me to work towards. 

It is now my very least favorite time of year, when I am over the snow and look outside and long for the sunshine and hot, hot summer days. 

It's a new normal, and something to adjust to. And I knew that. And I know. And everything will be great. It's better now than 10 days ago. We can talk and text everyday. Amazing. And this next step is going to be great. But it's the waiting to get to that point that is killing me.  

So now I need to find my happy things to do. And hope the wait isn't too long.